Thursday, March 17, 2011

Oscar time

Cats prepare for war.


All cats around the world are preparing for war. The cats are tired of being simple pets and now want to be the pet owners, meaning we will be the pets. Armed with claws and assault rifles they walk around in the night and cause trouble. It is only a matter of time before they rise up and there will be a full-scale war between humans and cats. This cat caught on camera was seen running around town terrorizing businesses. He has a battle hat made out of lightweight steel (it only looks like a melon). People have been reporting strange cat activities around the capitals around the world. It seams like they are taking up tactical positions to try and take down the world capitals before taking down the rest of the human civilization. Our only hope may be to try and get the dogs as allies in this future war. The cats have been the dogs rivals for many years now. It might be easy to get the dogs on our side because they have been mans best friend for many years. If the dogs do not join our side of the war there will be a hard fight between cats and humans. Of course people might say that humans are far superior to cats but no, they are agile, they are relatively smart, and they have sharp claws. Also people might ask how are the going to use the rifles; they do not even have opposable thumbs. Well there are a couple videos on the Internet where cats move their thumbs almost like humans move our hands. This means that cats have been holding this a secret and they have been planning this for several years while practicing to hold a gun. The president of the United States has said that there might be cats that have infiltrated our governments but he has not confirmed this.
An eye witness (anonymous) who saw his business get burned by cats says “They are merciless beasts, they know that this business is my living and still they burned it down with out any second thoughts”
There have been many other people that have had their houses and shops burned by the cats. If the dogs join us then this may be a piece of cake but if the dogs do not join us we will need all the luck we can get.

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